By: Camden Baucke MS LLP
This year’s presidential election stirred up a whirlwind of emotions and strong opinions across the country. Everyone has their own reaction, and these reactions are often influenced by deeply held values, beliefs, and worldviews. In the aftermath, it’s crucial to approach discussions in a way that keeps your mental health intact, especially around friends or family. This year’s election can be characterized by sacrificing the dinner table for the TV. To sustain yourself, but also connect with others, here is a guide for achieving balance between protecting your mental health and talking about the 2024 presidential election.
Allow Yourself to Have a Reaction
Recognizing your feelings is going to be crucial to recovering from the election. Last Tuesday evoked a range of emotions, and it’s important to give yourself plenty of time to process it. You are allowed to have your natural response to something as large and consequential as the presidential election. Especially if you discover that 60 to 70 million people endorse something you find extremely concerning. You’re allowed to feel upset about the choices others make, as their choices can mold the world you will live in. While everyone has a right to their own decisions, everyone also has a right to evaluate other’s participation in this shared decision. It’s a hard balance to respect someone’s choice while standing firm in your own beliefs. However, this year’s election is not just who you chose to represent yourself, but who other’s chose to represent you.
Use the Oxygen Mask First
Every airline tells you that in an emergency you must place the oxygen mask on yourself first before helping others. This is so that you will be healthy enough to help the next person. Practicing self-care is the oxygen mask and it will be essential throughout the aftermath of the election. Your mental health comes first, and it’s a healthy first step to take care of yourself. Spend time, even if only 10 minutes, to reflect on your own needs. If you feel jittery, go on a walk. If you can’t escape a certain thought, write it down or take a break from the news and social media. Deep breathing exercises, progressive muscle relaxation, and yoga are all effective methods for reducing stress. When you start to feel more grounded, you become better prepared to discuss the election with others.
Share with Those You Trust
This election is an opportunity to share your emotions during a time of normative distress. If you feel anxious, frustrated, or hopeless, you’re not alone. There are roughly 60 to 70 million individuals who would also share those feelings. Find people you trust, and maybe take a chance to share how you feel. As a result, you may find connection, commiseration, and empathy. Vulnerability can be much more palatable when others are feeling similarly. Additionally, someone trusted does not mean someone who votes the same way. It means someone you feel emotionally and mentally safe with while discussing politics. While it’s important to find and share with those who understand, it’s also important to consider how to speak to those who don’t.
Engage Carefully with Conflict
This presidential election was wrapped in vitriol and disagreement. This can easily be damaging to your relationships and mental health. Once you’ve taken care of yourself, it’s important to consider if you want to discuss the election with others who potentially disagree. Before you do, it’s crucial to ask yourself: What would you like out of a conversation? How will you know when it’s time to end the conversation? These thoughts lead to boundaries when discussing the election. If you are treated with disrespect, it’s important to have a set of short phrases to help you transition to the next part of your day. You can say things like “I’d rather we change the subject” or “I don’t feel comfortable talking about this anymore.” If you can find a safe person to disagree with, it’s worth considering the limits of your own disagreement.
Set the Rules of Engagement
Setting your own set of rules for discussing the election can be incredibly helpful. Boundaries are important and commonplace, as there are even rules for warfare. If you determine when, with who, and for how long you will talk about the election, it can protect your mental health. Setting these boundaries can prevent you from being blindsided or overwhelmed when speaking about the election. Boundaries allow you to engage in healthy discussion, not keep you from them. When you face someone crossing those boundaries, it’s important to consider what your response should be.
Debate, Defend, but Don’t Punish
The content of your discussion is crucial, but how you do so can make all the difference. Studies show that punishing someone is not the same as productive reinforcement. Reinforcement is giving something or taking something away to make a change in someone’s behavior. Persuasion is even another method of effectively changing someone’s mind. Punishment is making someone feel pain physically, mentally, or emotionally. Therefore, punishment doesn’t make someone think differently, it makes them avoid the punisher. Additionally, it entrenches someone further into their belief system, as the punishment is now associated with the message. Punishing others won’t change minds, it contributes to isolation and polarization. If you feel yourself becoming heated, or being hurt, don’t hesitate to walk away, take care of yourself, and choose the best option that sustains your health and your message.
Practice Empathy
Empathy is needed during global events like this year’s election. Empathy is not agreement, but consideration of someone else’s personal experience. Empathy is crucial for social health, as it allows us to understand life outside our own history and perspective. In today’s polarized environment, the news will benefit from division and anger. To combat this, take some time to see the election from the eyes of someone in a different situation or background. Empathy is not condescension, it’s about connecting on a human level.
Conclusion
In the wake of this year’s presidential election, mental health and social health are more important than ever. Meet your own needs first, allowing yourself at least 2 weeks to process your personal reaction to the election. If you feel comfortable, seek support from trusted individuals. Engage in respectful discussions with those who disagree, but keep yourself from punishing others in a way that would contribute to the problem. Foster empathy for those impacted by the election, if you agree with them or not, and set a personal structure around political discussions to help you stay grounded and feel safer in those scenarios. Self-care and compassion are crucial moving forward, allowing you to navigate these turbulent times and make the most out of life.
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